Because Feminism is Not Just For Women.

If you’ve been reading my blog for a while, you know by now that I’ve spoken a few times about feminism and it’s importance for the health of our society. I’ve been trying to sit back and digest my thoughts the last couple days, and I realized that most of that was honestly me just being afraid to speak my mind. well, that’s just stupid. so here goes.

In light of the Santa Barbara shooting, I’ve felt pretty heartbroken for the victims and their families. I also feel this heavy weight for women as a whole. I’ve spent a good amount of time reading through the #yesallwomen hashtag on twitter and it’s been so incredible to see all sorts of women speak up. It was hard to see just how pervasive sexism, misogyny, and rape culture is. I’m trying to be optimistic, and I’m struggling a little bit.

Feminism is NOT just for women. It’s not about overtaking men, and ruling the world with a purely female agenda. It’s simply an advocacy for equality. In fact, with the patriarchal system we have now it seems the best way to illicit any sort of lasting change is to make sure that the issue is understood by the very people that hold all the power, men. Men need to understand that women deal with a LOT of issues simply because of their gender. There’s a reason we walk with our keys between our fingers when we’re alone, a reason I’m afraid to go running at night, there’s a reason I text a friend to make sure I got home safe, a reason my dad was worried about me taking a cab alone from the airport in New York. This is why we ought to keep the discussion of gender issues going. This is why stories need to be shared, and issues addressed. Because to stay silent is to encourage an existing power system which is innately flawed.

I may be ranting, but since this is my blog, and my space to put my thoughts I’m most assuredly not going to apologize for that. Now tell me, please. your thoughts?

ps. If you’re curious at all of what I’ve been reading/listing too…. this  video got me thinking a lot, and this Ted talk was also really great. Not to mention this article and this article

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32 comments

  1. i found myself reading the #yesallwomen the other night for a few hours. i was seriously amazed with out quickly the thing grew. it was interesting for me to read and see all these women speak out and rather sad to see so many topics that you mentioned be so common. hope you are well lady. love ya

  2. i found myself reading the #yesallwomen the other night for a few hours. i was seriously amazed with out quickly the thing grew. it was interesting for me to read and see all these women speak out and rather sad to see so many topics that you mentioned be so common. hope you are well lady. love ya

  3. i found myself reading the #yesallwomen the other night for a few hours. i was seriously amazed with out quickly the thing grew. it was interesting for me to read and see all these women speak out and rather sad to see so many topics that you mentioned be so common. hope you are well lady. love ya

  4. I love that you posted this; it's been on my mind quite a bit lately. We all need feminism, and I think this meme will actually do quite a bit of good in getting rid of the usual strawman ideas about feminism that seem to be attacked or dismissed so often.

    A healthier dialogue is just so wonderful to see, and I hope there's more to come. I say this as a recovering mansplainer myself, who is learning the error of his ways, even though I've always considered myself a male feminist/ally. It's hard to examine patriarchy when one can comfortably live in ignorance inside it.

  5. I love that you posted this; it's been on my mind quite a bit lately. We all need feminism, and I think this meme will actually do quite a bit of good in getting rid of the usual strawman ideas about feminism that seem to be attacked or dismissed so often.

    A healthier dialogue is just so wonderful to see, and I hope there's more to come. I say this as a recovering mansplainer myself, who is learning the error of his ways, even though I've always considered myself a male feminist/ally. It's hard to examine patriarchy when one can comfortably live in ignorance inside it.

  6. I'm usually against Feminism but that is because most of the 'feminists' i know are all about putting men beneath them and rising to the top and I have found that a lot of men around me have grown up to be dependent on women for everything and have no responsibility for themselves and are in fact very insecure about themselves.

    But then there are people like you whom I wholeheartedly support. Equality is everything. It is fair. Man and woman were created equally in God's image and its Man's role to love the woman, to protect her, to make sure she can walk home in the dark without fear.

    I'm rambling a little but I just wanted you to know that I am with you! I am with women! and I am with equality! because that is how our God designed it to be xx

  7. I'm usually against Feminism but that is because most of the 'feminists' i know are all about putting men beneath them and rising to the top and I have found that a lot of men around me have grown up to be dependent on women for everything and have no responsibility for themselves and are in fact very insecure about themselves.

    But then there are people like you whom I wholeheartedly support. Equality is everything. It is fair. Man and woman were created equally in God's image and its Man's role to love the woman, to protect her, to make sure she can walk home in the dark without fear.

    I'm rambling a little but I just wanted you to know that I am with you! I am with women! and I am with equality! because that is how our God designed it to be xx

  8. I'm usually against Feminism but that is because most of the 'feminists' i know are all about putting men beneath them and rising to the top and I have found that a lot of men around me have grown up to be dependent on women for everything and have no responsibility for themselves and are in fact very insecure about themselves.

    But then there are people like you whom I wholeheartedly support. Equality is everything. It is fair. Man and woman were created equally in God's image and its Man's role to love the woman, to protect her, to make sure she can walk home in the dark without fear.

    I'm rambling a little but I just wanted you to know that I am with you! I am with women! and I am with equality! because that is how our God designed it to be xx

  9. I agree, in that feminism should be about equality and mutual respect between genders. I'm not a fan of extremism or the "pendulum swing" to overcompensate for whatever inequalities exist. Moderation, equality, respect. These are good things.

  10. thank you thank you thank you. I also think that it's important that men embrace feminist ideologies, but in order for them to really help, they need to do more than just call themselves "feminists." they need to take the power they have and make their own sphere a feminist one rather than just separating themselves into the feminist sphere. thanks for not apologizing for your thoughts–I agree with everything you said!
    Rebecca @ trbcca.com

  11. thank you thank you thank you. I also think that it's important that men embrace feminist ideologies, but in order for them to really help, they need to do more than just call themselves "feminists." they need to take the power they have and make their own sphere a feminist one rather than just separating themselves into the feminist sphere. thanks for not apologizing for your thoughts–I agree with everything you said!
    Rebecca @ trbcca.com

  12. thank you thank you thank you. I also think that it's important that men embrace feminist ideologies, but in order for them to really help, they need to do more than just call themselves "feminists." they need to take the power they have and make their own sphere a feminist one rather than just separating themselves into the feminist sphere. thanks for not apologizing for your thoughts–I agree with everything you said!
    Rebecca @ trbcca.com

  13. Well since I stumbled across this blog a few weeks back, it seems every time I check back there's some good debate going on from "across the pond". The current newspiece of the New Delhi women who were gang raped and then hanged highlights the scale of the issue does it not? Takes it to another brutal level and you need more than a feminist 'consensus or ideology' to deal with things on that level, surely?. Bruce V-C makes a good point that the victims more often than not are not the perpetuators and that it's easy for the male to maintain a false perspective or sense of equilibrium and so I guess that within the limits of this blog it could be easy to for us guys to share and/or reveal our feminine side but when innocent mothers, sisters and children (viz the current headline of the 300 Nigerian teenage girls captured for enslavement) are being brutalised on such a scale, what consensus or ideology is going to stop that? Don't get me wrong – I share all the wishes on this blog for mutual gender respect but it needs empowerment in the civic and parliament halls. And by the way, I don't think you smilemepretty author is ranting. You're voicing your wish for a better world and maybe memes are the best channels for that!

  14. Well since I stumbled across this blog a few weeks back, it seems every time I check back there's some good debate going on from "across the pond". The current newspiece of the New Delhi women who were gang raped and then hanged highlights the scale of the issue does it not? Takes it to another brutal level and you need more than a feminist 'consensus or ideology' to deal with things on that level, surely?. Bruce V-C makes a good point that the victims more often than not are not the perpetuators and that it's easy for the male to maintain a false perspective or sense of equilibrium and so I guess that within the limits of this blog it could be easy to for us guys to share and/or reveal our feminine side but when innocent mothers, sisters and children (viz the current headline of the 300 Nigerian teenage girls captured for enslavement) are being brutalised on such a scale, what consensus or ideology is going to stop that? Don't get me wrong – I share all the wishes on this blog for mutual gender respect but it needs empowerment in the civic and parliament halls. And by the way, I don't think you smilemepretty author is ranting. You're voicing your wish for a better world and maybe memes are the best channels for that!

  15. it's exactly that dismissal that feminism is given that frustrates me so much, I agree though. It's wonderful to see a healthier dialogue begin to emerge

  16. it's exactly that dismissal that feminism is given that frustrates me so much, I agree though. It's wonderful to see a healthier dialogue begin to emerge

  17. it's exactly that dismissal that feminism is given that frustrates me so much, I agree though. It's wonderful to see a healthier dialogue begin to emerge

  18. well I hope I've helped you to me usually FOR feminism now 🙂

    there's always gonna be those who put a bad taste in our mouth about any cause. I'm hoping that we can approach change at a more reasonable level. One that promotes discussion and not dismissal or rudeness.

  19. well I hope I've helped you to me usually FOR feminism now 🙂

    there's always gonna be those who put a bad taste in our mouth about any cause. I'm hoping that we can approach change at a more reasonable level. One that promotes discussion and not dismissal or rudeness.

  20. Andrew! You're great. It starts I think with men beginning to lead the discussions. Men have a lot of power in the modern world, so they kind of have a great platform for futhering the cause. It can be as simple as kindly speaking when someone says something sexist. When done enough and in the right spirit, I feel it can help ignite some understanding of issues that many have been refusing to even acknowledge

  21. Andrew! You're great. It starts I think with men beginning to lead the discussions. Men have a lot of power in the modern world, so they kind of have a great platform for futhering the cause. It can be as simple as kindly speaking when someone says something sexist. When done enough and in the right spirit, I feel it can help ignite some understanding of issues that many have been refusing to even acknowledge

  22. you make a good point, this is an issue that goes beyond a twisted perspective or women in media. This is an issue that tragically affects all parts of the earth. If there is any way to get a mainstream discussion, social media has proven to be effective before. I mean just look at the influence twitter had on Arab Spring!

  23. you make a good point, this is an issue that goes beyond a twisted perspective or women in media. This is an issue that tragically affects all parts of the earth. If there is any way to get a mainstream discussion, social media has proven to be effective before. I mean just look at the influence twitter had on Arab Spring!

  24. you make a good point, this is an issue that goes beyond a twisted perspective or women in media. This is an issue that tragically affects all parts of the earth. If there is any way to get a mainstream discussion, social media has proven to be effective before. I mean just look at the influence twitter had on Arab Spring!

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